I Wish I Was Kidding
I picked up a mystery novel today, by an author I’ve never read before. One the first page there were five of the most commonly used clichés in mystery writing.
They were, in no particular order:
1. I died twice
2. Some one tried to save me
3. Some one tried to kill me
4. Dying isn’t what you think
5. My father hated black, so when he died I wouldn’t wear black. Even though Mom tried to make me. (This one is so epic, it probably counts as a cliché across all literature)
On the first page!
In a way I don’t know what to do next.
A) Turn the page and keep reading, because hope springs eternal?
B) Close the book and return it to the library?
C) Drive it to the library immediately and demand something that has been edited more harshly?
I await your guidance. Because I’m totally bumfuzzled.